Are Pets More Work Than Children?
Currently mother to two more 'babies' (three if you count Next-Door's rabbit, of which more later). Emma was really sweet, if a touch frog-like, but cleaned her teeth every night. Now she's gone but has left behind Jack, who should really be in bed by now. Ollie has lots of baths (good sign for a boy), but we don't know yet the sex of his offspring.
Yes, the Baby Smats have acquired Tamagotchis, which are actually proving more fun for myself and Mr Smat ("I just earned 100 points playing Header!"), in an attempt to prove that they (the Baby Smats, not Mr Smat and I - we've proved out credentials) are responsible enough to have A Pet. I'm pushing for a cat (doesn't need walking, will poo outside) in preference to anything rat-like which needs an indoor cage. I am however strangely tempted by a rescue greyhound, although that may be due to the many articles I've read recently in the Sunday broadsheets.
(note to self: you're not trendy enough to follow broadsheet advice especially ref: keeping chickens).
But I'm using Next Door as an example of How Not to Do Pets (or children if it comes to that). Their rabbit is, as I type, eating the grass in MY garden. They let it out of it's run because "it doesn't like being in there". So now it's in MY garden, eating MY grass, and pooing where MY bare feet will tread in it while hanging out the washing. If I wanted poo all over the place I'd've had children. Oh yes, been there, done that. They come with vomit as well. Fortunately we were waiting till potty training had been accomplished to replace all internal carpeting.
But suggestions for dealing with rabbit please; also which pet would make a suitable addition to the House of Smat?
Yes, the Baby Smats have acquired Tamagotchis, which are actually proving more fun for myself and Mr Smat ("I just earned 100 points playing Header!"), in an attempt to prove that they (the Baby Smats, not Mr Smat and I - we've proved out credentials) are responsible enough to have A Pet. I'm pushing for a cat (doesn't need walking, will poo outside) in preference to anything rat-like which needs an indoor cage. I am however strangely tempted by a rescue greyhound, although that may be due to the many articles I've read recently in the Sunday broadsheets.
(note to self: you're not trendy enough to follow broadsheet advice especially ref: keeping chickens).
But I'm using Next Door as an example of How Not to Do Pets (or children if it comes to that). Their rabbit is, as I type, eating the grass in MY garden. They let it out of it's run because "it doesn't like being in there". So now it's in MY garden, eating MY grass, and pooing where MY bare feet will tread in it while hanging out the washing. If I wanted poo all over the place I'd've had children. Oh yes, been there, done that. They come with vomit as well. Fortunately we were waiting till potty training had been accomplished to replace all internal carpeting.
But suggestions for dealing with rabbit please; also which pet would make a suitable addition to the House of Smat?
posted by Smat @ 9:05 PM
3 Comments:
At 2:39 PM,
Stef the engineer said…
Get a cat, preferably from a rescue centre as someone else will have dealt with all that toilet training business. If you get a cat it can play with next door's rabbit. This will amuse the cat, and the Baby Smats, for a while, and save you a couple of days' pet food. It can also teach a valuable lesson about both the "Big Circle of Life" (aka "The big hutch in the sky, and why Mr. Twitch will do fine in heaven with only half a face") and, importantly, "Why Lying to the Neighbours is Sometimes Acceptable."
"Your rabbit? No, haven't seen it. I've been busy digging this flowerbed here. I'll let you know if it crops up."
With the right cat you can also teach your children "why cat-owners are sometimes suspected of being into self harm" and the need to know your blood group at all times.
Be aware that a true cat will shower you with affection, while evaluating you as a potential emergency food source for times of crisis. The odd bite or scratch is not mad moment; it's a disaster drill to stay in practice. If Next Door have children you disapprove of, you may be lucky in pointing them out as potential prey. There is little funnier than a large cat stalking a small child in an unkempt garden (although past a certain size difference - e.g. tiger and 3 year old - you should no longer laugh out loud in polite company.)
At 7:21 PM,
Smat said…
Welcome Stef, and thank you for the good advice. Going to have to wait a few months though because we're currently on non-speaking terms with the rabbit neighbours, and possibly sending a cat into their garden might not be the most tactful thing to do right at the moment.
And surely toilet training can't be that hard (I fancy a little kitten you see)
At 3:27 PM,
Stef the engineer said…
Sorry about the neighbour problems. We're generally on good terms. At least, I think we are. We sit down for a few drinks, then a few more, and next thing I remember we're waking up with stinking heads, and feeling like someone has p*ssed in our mouths. If they didn't look worse than we do afterwards I'd be suspicious.
If you've managed the baby Smats, kittens are probably easier to toilet train. The biggie is really the first road crossing on their own. Older cats have made it past the car recognition stage, with some being weeded out. Our first cat was only just out of kittenhood, and when she finally went out didn't follow the green cross code. :-( (I'm told that this natural selection process isn't applied to children. I'm also told we're not ready for kids yet, which is probably true.) One of our current two also had a tangle, and now has a permanent limp. Judging by the tyre marks after the incident, we suspect the car came off worse.
There are some cats which are recommended for "indoor only," but generally you then need to schedule time to play with them, otherwise they become (even more) psychotic. I did hear of one unfortunate "claw-sharpening on a waterbed" incident.
We kept tropical fish for a while, which was more fun than it sounds, and you could consider. Good starter pets. Just do not, under any circumstances, give them names. (Learnt at cost after an unfortunate "48 hour powercut" episode. "Mr. Wiggly", "Mr. Ugly", "The Boss" et al all became "Mr. Floating Upside Down on the Top of the Tank." Very sad.)
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